'I Stole My Dad's Morphine Tablets To Survive My Girlfriend's Birthday Present'

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A few years ago I dodged a huge fight with my girlfriend because I almost had to cancel her birthday present.

My girlfriend is obsessed with The Hobbit/Lord Of The Rings. I suggested a movie marathon that was playing at our local cinema.

What my girlfriend didn't know is that my prostatitis hit a few weeks after I suggested sitting for twenty hours in a packed movie theatre.

I'd developed excruciating pain in my lower back and a full kind of feeling in my bladder if I sat down for too long. But I knew getting up to go to the toilet every ten minutes wasn't an option.

I stole some of my dad's knee-replacement morphine tablets and bought one of those portable urinal systems with a mini funnel. I strapped a 1-litre urine bag to my thigh and wore baggy pants to accommodate the funnel. When each movie finished I went to the disabled toilets to drain the bag and reset.

When the final movie finished I started crying from a combination of the morphine and the relief. 

My girlfriend thought I'd become a LOTR convert and still doesn't know the real reason for my tears. 

S. Harris, 29, Brighton, UK 

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Hi, I'm Simon. I know exactly what you're going through. I've successfully managed my chronic prostatitis for the past eleven years and written about it for the national UK press . The condition can be an absolute bitch. But there's no need to suffer in desperation. I interview leading urologists, physiotherapists and sufferers about the best way to deal with the condition. Sign up to the free, anonymous, newsletter for exclusive content to prevent prostatitis impacting on your life . Unsubscribe at any time. Feel free to drop me a line at: thisiscoaps@gmail.com Or...join the private Facebook group to get advice, tips and suggestions right now .  
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